11:51

breathebreathbreathe. release. fly.letfly. be open to guidance. so hard

so i went camping for the last few days. it was nice. i wish i had liked it more. to be completely honest with myself-i eflt as if i was supposed to play this role of the ridiculous, happy-go-lucky, hilarious brother. i am sad about that. i am sad that i felt judged and that i have to fill this role all the time.
i was different. i am different than last summer. iamchanged.

the thing is, i am happy with who i am right now. i do not know if that offends some people, especially my family, but seriously, i am so excited who i have become over this past year.
all year, i have felt cucooned into one mold of a person, who i am supposed to be. to want to be. it did not fit. graduating let me shed, and renew into a different person. not a differnt person i guess, but my real person:
i do not think i am that funny. i do not find humor in much, but the things i do think are funny-are hilarious.
i like quiet. i appreciate solo time. loud places bug me, if i am not in the mood.
i like to be healthy. i like to run.
i am tired of trying to please people, so i will not make them angry. let them be. learn to be happy.
i will be real, if you give me time.
i love to experience new things, even if they endanger my life. these things are for me, nobody else. just time to experience my body, my life. irresponsible freedom. irresistible.

iamme. accept me or not. love me or do not. i do not know.
please do not tell me how to live my life though.
i love you. i am happy for how much you have accomplished. not everyone will go your "smart" way. accept them too.me too.
fly.letfly. release. 12:13
peace of mind.db